SEALDON PINNIPEDERSON

Tavishi

One of my favorite book series is Brandon Sanderson's Stormlight Archive. Great series, absolutely obsessed. In my grief and mourning over the eight years I will have to wait for book six (what the heck, Brando Sando?), I've decided to try to get over the sadness in the wake of Wind and Truth by coping with seals.

Without further ado, I will now assign pinniped species to Cosmere characters!

Kaladin Stormblessed is an absolutely, tragic character. He is always sad and going through some major life trauma. And for that reason, he's a Baikal seal, which somehow always manage to look like they're crying. They look completely and utterly pitiful, just like everyone's favorite windrunner.

bro's glowin

Shallan Davar, the most iconic ginger, only followed by Ron Weasley, is one of my favorite characters in the series. Artist, scientist, and epically traumatized (running pattern here), Shallan is wonderful. She's smart and so, so driven. Her only flaw is that she's a redhead. But because of her unfortunate pheomelanin amount, she's a bearded seal, because they often turn red because of iron in water.

Hoid is a silly creature. I've recently started reading Mistborn and keep getting jumpscared by Hoid. He's supposed to stay in Roshar. Why is he EVERYWHERE? How is he basically a god. It's not okay, it's deeply upsetting. No matter what, he's always off insulting someone or getting involved in galactic politics by means of a flute. The sheer chaos that accompanies Hoid means he's a New Zealand sea lion, the most interfering, chaotic pinnipeds.

Jasnah is so cool. I admire the historian in her, and the diplomat. Queen of Alethkar! My heart absolutely broke for her in Wind and Truth when Taravangian screwed her and Queen Fen over. What the heck, Odium? I appreciate how starkly independent she is, even though I'm nothing like her. But throughout the series, we've gotten to know Jasnah very little. For that reason, she's a Ross seal, one of the least studied elusive pinnipeds.

Lopen is a joke of a character, and for that, he is one of my favorites. There's no one like the Lopen. He calls everyone and their mother gancho, and honestly, reminds me of a Scottish person sometimes. Because Herdaz is north of Alethkar, Lopen's gotta be one of the Arctic pinnipeds. And because he is so utterly ridiculous, the Lopen is a northern fur seal.

he wants some chouta

Rock, the self appointed soup making dad of Bridge Four is undeniably a walrus. Rock is a gentle, soft giant (his conversations with Syl are so wholesome), and by far, he has the silliest way he ended up in the bridge crews. Also, because Rock stew probably contains crustaceans, he's probably a walrus, because they primarily feed on little mollusks and critters of the sort.

Finally, Syl. Everyone's favorite literate spren with a chull under her dress. Syl is so entertaining, funny, and all around a great character. No explanation for the end of Wind and Truth, but I will wait till 2033 to get one. She is so silly, and to be honest, only Rock treats her the way she deserves. She is basically a little piece of God..

No explanation needed, Syl is a Caspian seal.